Real Housewives of Vienna
Episode One: Café Landtmann
Vienna, 1901
We find, deep in Vienna, City of Dreams, home of the great (as soon to be even greater) artists,
musicians, and innovators, a coffee house. The sign on the door reads Café Landtmann.
Inside, armored in a large, sleek black hat, and a gold necklace which stretches the whole length of
her neck and draping down her bosom, sits Alma Mahler, fiancee of the broody but brilliant Gustav
Mahler. They are to be married in a year’s time, but as of yet, it is a secret. She quietly sips her
espresso, slowly, delicately, with a slight look of annoyance on her face.
In with a rush, wind blowing quite a bit too frigid for September, runs a short, very pregnant
woman with snow stuck in the midst of her short, thick brown hair. She sits.
“You slump too much,” Alma says, finishing her espresso, “It’s unladylike.”
She smiles an almost convincing smile. Mathilda, (soon to be wed to the even more broody Arnold Schoenberg) barely seeming to notice, gives an similar (though perhaps a bit more convincing) smile. It is quite impossible to beat the smile of a woman raised by a Sephardic Jew (father), a Sarajevo Muslim (mother), and a Catholic brother.
“Sorry I’m late. The Wiener Linien bus was running with a surprisingly slower pace than usual.”
Alma, without noticing this,
“So the wedding, you’re still going through with it?”
“Yes certainly. It was truly meant to be.”
A blush, replacing the pink of the cold with an almost ruby red, spread as fast as the smile which
followed.
“Meant to be married to a penniless composer will certainly make you happy.”
Mathilda, with sudden seriousness,
“Remember that your Mahler was once penniless himself.”
Alma giggles,
“Relax Mathilda. I am just pushing your buttons.”
“Anyways, my Schoenberg is so taken by Mahler’s thoughts on music. He never stops talking
about him. We must get together again at once,” Mathilda, cheerful again, exclaimed.
“Yes, because the last one ended so well.”
“Oh Alma, men will be men. We must let them yell and scream like little boys while we manage
what matters. Such is the life of a wife.”
“Such is the life of an artist’s wife,” says Alma, with a genuine smirk.
She continues,
“Oh course Mahler and I will be at the wedding. Make sure to include us as well as an extra seat
for Gropius.”
“Walter Gropius, the architect?”
“Yes, the same. He has taken interest in my latest compositions and wishes to accompany us to
discuss them.”
"And how does Mahler feel about this?"
"He's oblivious, as always. He wishes only for my happiness. This makes me happy."
Mathilde coughs, thinking how horrible a time this would be for a cold. Alma, feeling satisfied but
bored of how the conversation was turning, gets up, tilts her hat forward to prepare for the snow
(which has become heavier during the current events). Mathilde rises as well. The women exchange
a customary cheek kiss, reprise they're earlier smiles, and Alma walks out into the early afternoon
light. Mathilde sits back down, sighs, and motions to the waiter.
Stay tuned for Episode Two: The Wedding
References consulted:
http://www.richardgerstl.com/arnold-and-mathilde-schonberg
https://www.wien.gv.at/english/transportation-urbanplanning/public-transport/
http://www.alma-mahler.at/engl/almas_life/almas_life1.html
http://www.landtmann.at/en/the-cafe-landtmann.html
